When the Door Closes

“Sometimes growth looks like not needing the closure you used to beg for.”—Unknown

I used to fall apart when someone I cared about just disappeared without explanation. When communication stopped, when messages went unread, when silence stretched longer than I could bear. Those are the moments I would spiral. Overthink. Wonder what I did wrong. Try to make sense of something that didn’t make sense.

But I’ve changed.

When it happens now there’s still pain. There’s still confusion, sure. I still feel the ache of missing someone I wasn’t ready to lose. But it doesn’t undo me the way it once did. The panic is quieter now and the need to chase answers has softened.

Softened because the truth is, I’ve done the same thing. There have been moments in my life when I chose to close the door. There have been times when things felt too complicated, too risky or just too heavy and I intentionally took a step back. I disconnected or I disappeared. Not to be cruel, but to protect myself and give myself a chance to catch my breath and figure things out.

And now, when it happens to me… I get it. I can look at the closed door and not

crumble. This is because I know something important: just because the door is closed doesn’t mean it’s locked.

I don’t need to force it open. I don’t need to bang on it for answers. Alternatively, I can take the space that’s been given and use it to breathe and reflect. I can use the space to grow.

I’ve come to a place in my life where I don’t assume silence means I wasn’t enough or that I did something wrong. Sometimes it means the other person isn’t ready to face what is on the other side of the door. So, they close it. Sometimes it means I’m the one that is not ready. And sometimes, it’s just life. And life can be messy and complicated.

But the most powerful thing I have learned about myself? I now know how to trust that if something is meant to return, it will. And if it doesn’t there is a reason. And I do not need to know because I know I’ll still be okay.

I’m not pretending not to care because just because the door closed doesn’t mean what I felt was not real. This is more about learning to care for myself more and how to protect my peace. I’ve learned to listen to my intuition more than my heart and trust it. Because this is about becoming the kind of woman who can hold uncertainty without falling apart. This is about becoming the kind of woman who doesn’t need closure to keep moving forward and has the courage and strength to do it alone.

I’m not who I was a year ago. And maybe that’s just the closure I needed all along.

I’m learning that sometimes when a door closes, we don’t need all the answers to move forward. I’m learning that having just enough peace to stop looking for them in places that keep hurting is power and with that power comes the strength to move forward that I didn’t realize I had.

What about you? Have you ever closed a door, or had one closed on you, and found healing in the space it left behind? I’d love to hear your story.

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